Monday, November 09, 2009


I once used a knife in the apartment that Robot and I shared back in the day and apologized to him--I hadn't washed dishes in weeks.

He said, "I don't care. What could be easier washing than a knife?".

I don't remember my response, although I think it may have been less incredulous than warranted because of self-interest. But I've been thinking about this for a few years now and I disagree completely.

The virtue of a knife is its cutting edge, not its sides, and nothing is harder to clean. When you clean it, you have to negotiate the Scylla/Charybdis (is this meme old?) of squeezing the sponge too hard and cutting it, or not actually getting the knife clean. This problem is amplified by the fact that you can't really examine this essential part of the object you're cleaning: hopefully, if you've got a good knife, it's very hard to see.

So the truth is that a glass is easier to clean because you can find the biofilm disgustingness that lies upon it by examining it from the exterior. I now wonder how many of the number of times I was sick while I was living with Robot were caused by his inept cleaning of knives.

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Blogger Austin 5-000 said...

My lungs hurt from cigs; thanks Robot!

12:15 AM  
Blogger Alex Thompson said...

Raven used glass knives.

12:30 AM  
Blogger Austin 5-000 said...

nice ref

12:31 AM  
Blogger Alex Thompson said...

When you told me that book was good, I should have listened.

12:45 AM  
Blogger Robot said...

I won't use this comment to dwell on the fact that you have turned my benevolence in the face of your filth into an act of making you sick--that you have turned perfection into the enemy of the good. I will not, in other words, insist that you not crucify me on a cross of liquid dish soap.

Turning to the substance of the debate, might we not consider the fact that a 95% cleansing of bacteria on a knife be sufficient, and that the 5% is working to our benefit?

4:29 PM  
Blogger The Sheriff said...

wrap sponge around back of blade, have sponge large enough to fully nestle sides of blade. No sponge cutting, more knife cleaning.

12:09 AM  

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