Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Eat at Denny's

The only joy I've gotten out of the continuing Mark Foley scandal is something Austin and I noticed long ago, namely that Dennis Hastert is immensely fat.

I'm just sayin'.


Blogger Josh the Hippie Killer said...

Scantron, how ignorant can you be?

Denny's actually has many healthy items on their new Fit Fare Menu (all with 15 grams of fat or less!). Below are some of the highlights:

Veggie Omelette An Egg Beaters® omelette with sautéed onions, green peppers and mushrooms folded in with diced tomatoes. Served with dry toast, English muffin or bagel.
Carbohydrates=38g Calories=332 Fat=8g Fiber=5g

Skinny Moons Ham and scrambled Egg Beaters® sandwich on toasted sourdough. Served with fruit.
Carbohydrates=60g Calories=496 Fat=11g Fiber=3g

Slim Slam® Scrambled Egg Beaters®, a slice of grilled honey ham and two buttermilk pancakes with choice of cinnamon-apple, blueberry, strawberry or cherry topping.
Carbohydrates=53g Calories=480 Fat=13g Fiber=2g

Boca® Burger A meatless combination of soy, spices and cheese on a sesame seed bun. Served with lettuce, tomato, onions, pickles and a side of fruit.
Carbohydrates=79g Calories=512 Fat=11g Fiber=10g

Grilled Chicken Sandwich A seasoned, grilled chicken breast with lettuce, tomato and pickles on a sesame seed bun. Served with applesauce.
Without dressing: Carbohydrates=68g Calories=478 Fat=9g Fiber=5g

Grilled Chicken Breast Salad A seasoned, grilled chicken breast sliced and served on top of mixed greens with tomatoes, cucumbers, red onions and Cheddar cheese.
Without dressing: Carbohydrates=10g Calories=259 Fat=11g Fiber=4g

Turkey Breast Salad Sliced turkey on top of mixed greens with tomatoes, cucumbers, red onions and Cheddar cheese.
Without dressing: Carbohydrates=12g Calories=248 Fat=8g Fiber=4g

NEW Grilled Tilapia A mild, white fish filet seasoned and grilled, then placed on a bed of savory vegetable rice pilaf. Served with green beans and tomato slices.
Carbohydrates=42g Calories=471 Fat=14g Fiber=5g

Grilled Chicken A delicious, seasoned, grilled chicken breast served with green beans and tomato slices.
Carbohydrates=11g Calories=184 Fat=5g Fiber=3g

To all the health conscious bloggers out there, you can catch me at your friendly, neighborhood Denny's.

7:50 PM  
Blogger curry king said...

In all seriousness, I hope Democrats don't continue in supporting the release of the "shocking," "vulgar," and "lurid" IM/email conversations of Rep. Foley. It reminds me far too much of Clintongate and the Starr Report, where the Republicans publicly appealed to "American values" in order to disgrace Clinton's sexual extravaganzas. Sure, Foley likes boys' genitals, but this needs to stop soon. Hippie Killer, I bet you added Maf54 to your buddy list.

On a side note, the word "maf" means "excuse me" in Hindi.

8:03 PM  
Blogger Scantron said...

Hippie Killer, it seems that I do owe the venerable Denny's Corporation (although not Denny Hastert's corpulence) an apology. However, two observations:

1) If ever a list were to be compiled of all the silly restaurant item names which have been trademarked (Slim Slam, etc), no one, not even the most easily tickled, would endure to read through the whole thing.

2) The choice being between something called "Skinny Moons Ham" and regular ol' steak 'n' eggs, it's no wonder so many Americans are obese.

Curry, something tells me this thing will last until either someone is indicted, fired, or resigns (and it ain't gonna stop at Foley) or the public tires of the whole affair. We'll see which comes first! I agree that the entire affair is ridiculously overblown and politicized, though. That's an election year for ya.

12:02 AM  
Blogger Austin 5-000 said...

I was thinking of this very same issue the other day. Reading the Wall Street Journal, I noticed that their little engraving of Hastert had smaller jowls than the man himself. As I looked around on google images, I discovered that the diffference was too small to warrant a serious blog post. Bummer. Still, the sheer width of the man is shocking to me to this day.

12:33 PM  
Blogger Austin 5-000 said...

From the New York Times:
"The speaker once boased that neither he nor his roommates had cooked a meal since 1986, preferring to dine out".

10:39 AM  

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