Blog THIS, fatass

Apparently my tardy entry to the blogosphere has not gone unnoticed! Austin falsely believes that I waste my hours pacing back and forth in my trailer in my thrift store kimono, chain-smoking, thinking about celebrities and eating the occasional microwave burrito. This is not the case! I rarely chain smoke. Admittedly, I have been hesitant to post since many of the articles I find intriguing can be found on Mefi, BBC, NPR and ALDaily - sites that I know most of you visit with some regularity. Rather than rehashing news stories we've heard about eleventy billion times or prattling on inanely about personal grievances, I wanted to bring you all something very special. Instead I bring you this article, whose relevence springs from my deep concern for the morbidly obsese. Do you realize that 3000 Americans die each year from obesity related causes such as heart disease, diabetes and stroke? Those of you who are keeping up with the charming online cartoon "Achewood" know that Ray Smuckles himself is fighting obesity-induced diabetes. The saddest part is that although we have access to plastic surgery that make us trimmer, liposuction does nothing for your arteries. On the other hand, plastic surgery can go horribly wrong, and you'll be left looking like America's favorite drunken ho, Tara Reid, who has an undeniably grotesque stomach. And while we're on the subject of plastic surgery, I'd like to add that America's favorite US Representative from the 22nd Congressional District of Texas may be implicated as well. Check out his weird nostrils.

That is all, thank you.